Spencer Heath Archive

Item 2062

Typed copy of the Lord’s Prayer written in bureaucratese. Whether or not Heath was the author, which is unknown, he greatly enjoyed it as humorous spoof and tacked it up on the wall at Roadsend Gardens, Elkridge. This is in high contrast to his version of the Lord’s Prayer in words of one syllable.

 

 

 

 

 

Oh Parent, at present deemed to be

domiciled in the stratosphere,

May Your name (to be entered in triplicate

in block letters) be established and maintained

on the highest level of sacrosanctity.

May You be allotted and maintain an area of

control with appropriate powers of administration.

May Your policy be fully executed on a geopolitical basis as well as in your normal stratospherical

sphere of influence.

We should be obliged for your attention in providing

that our daily intake of cereal filler be not in

short supply.

Further, we should be grateful if all sentences

re­corded against us for misdemeanors be kept under constant review with the purpose of subsequent

cancel­lation.

It would be fair to remember that we are adopting an analogous policy with respect to those who have inflicted injury upon ourselves.

Avert from us all redundant opportunities for unethical delinquency.

And initiate protective measures to safeguard us against any anti-social activities or tendencies to decidivism.